SPECIAL EDITION TRUMP NUCLEAR ATTACK SAFETY TIPS
Rest easy, the TRUMP KIDS will be safe. So will your congressPERSONS. They will be ushered into a large bomb shelter facility 40 stories below the earth. The shelter will be equipped with all the modern conveniences. These include swimming pools, workout gyms, a gourmet restaurant, spa, movie theaters and much much more. You and your children however will not have access to this facility. Instead you will have to learn the skill of “Duck and Cover.” Think of this as you Get Obamacare and Congress gets its lavish PPO for life at no charge.
Duck and Cover:
For some of you this will be old information which you learned in your elementary schools back in the 1960’s when another Hothead named Nikita Khrushchev, no relations to Trump, sent nuclear missiles to Cuba and pointed them at the United States. Please take a few moments to view this video with your children and grandchildren and assist them in learning the skill that may save their lives in a Nuclear Attack: Duck and Cover.
And now you are ready for the “Real Thing!”
This is a dramatization. In the 1960’s there were no safe rooms. This is why your grandparents turned out so mean. Thank God they are not in charge of your bandwidth. Nevertheless do not view this video if you are along. Do not call the phone company or Civil Defense. This is a simulation. Fair warning… This film is lacking in diversity and in some cases promotes gender stereotypes.
JOIN THE TEAM: DO YOUR JOB!
These whitebread kids are from the 50’s so they had a lot higher IQ’s and SAT scores than you have. But don’t worry those old tests were slanted to favor white privilege. These kids wouldn’t know good smoke from bad smoke. Sure can’t use a Geiger Counter for that!
Don’t Let the Ice Cream Melt!
The morality question of the 1950’s was should you let your neighbors into your bomb shelter if they were caught unprepared. Having limited food, water and supplies most would agree the screaming, crying, pleading, and pounding on your locked tight shelter doors from frantic neighbors would eventually subside. A good set of head phones and a battery operated Hi Fi might come in handy.
Just in case your child is Bullied on the way to or from a bomb shelter, Trump wanted you all to know how to handle a Bully… 1950’s style.
Trump and his Generals are here to keep you safe!
Here is a nice bit about the Underground Bomb Shelter at Greenbrier in West Virginia.